Why did Shakespeare refuse to join the army?

He didn't like the phrase fire at will!

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Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?

Because he didn't like DC...

Why don't native Americans like snow?

We don't like anything white on our land.

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Why did all of Britain stop smoking pot?

Because they all joined

Why did the King's Justice join Run DMC?

Cuz he be Ilyn.

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Where does the king keep his armies?

In his sleevies!

Where do generals keep their armies?

in their sleevies

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What is Shakespeare's favourite snack?

Hamlet du fromage

When you ask her "Have you ever read Shakespeare?

And she answers "No, who wrote it " .... Keep moving.

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Why did he refuse help?

He was in The Nile

How do you confuse a feminist?

Tell her you refuse to allow her to make you a sandwich.