Why did the Dad divorce his wife after she named their son?

She named him Oedipus.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did my wife cross the road?

To go back into the first clothes shop we went into two hours ago.

What is the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

About 60 pounds.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

Whats the best part about dating a black girl?

You rarely have to meet their dad.

How did the pig get out of the tree?

The swine flu (joke my dad made up a couple years back during all this)

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

Who's the best Mom ever?

Son: Oprah! Me: Gimme the damn cookies back! Son: See Oprah GIVES, she doesn't take!

What did the potato name his son?

Chip. Sorry.

Divorce Jokes More Divorce Jokes

Why did Frosty the Snowman want a divorce?

Because he thought his wife was a flake.

Why do fifty percent of marriages end in divorce?

Well, I'm guessing it's because the other fifty percent can't afford lawyers.

Oedipus Jokes More Oedipus Jokes

Why is Oedipus against swearing?

He kisses his mother with that mouth!

What does Oedipus the king's mother wear under her dress?

Q: what does Oedipus the king's mother wear under her dress? A: a Freudian slip