Why do men buy electric lawn mowers?

A. So they can find their way back to the house.

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What did Waldo say at the Superbowl?

I'm just here so I won't get find.

Why haven't we found aliens yet ?

because they are searching for intelligent life too.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How many men does it take to wallpaper a feminists house?

Only one, but you have to slice him REALLY thin!

What do you call a man with no arms or legs who likes to go swimming?

Bob.

House Jokes More House Jokes

How do you get to Matthew McConaughey's House?

All right, all right, all right..

An IPv6 packet is walking out of the house.

He goes nowhere.

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

How does an elephant get out of a small car ?

The same way that he got in !

Why did Amy Schumer go to a psychic?

Because it's the only way she'll ever get near a medium.

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Which whiskey should you buy if you want to dance all night?

Wild Twerky!

Who wants two tickets to the gun show?

I bought the Groupon but can't make it :(

A. Jokes More A. Jokes

How does Bill Gates enter his house?

A. He uses "windows".

How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

A. Hell you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.