Why do strippers look better in the club than outside the club?

Black lights matter.

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why can't we feed the animals?

Wife: They'll get lazy and dependent and never, ever go away. Me: *looks warily at our kids*

What Did The Jumbo Shrimp Say To The Jumbo Crab?

Looks like you've got me in a pinch."

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

Where do you want to be in 5 years?

Me: Oh, it doesn't matter. You will have fired me well before then.

What do the Police, the NFL and Black Lives Matter all have in common?

They all have the same PR guy.

Club Jokes More Club Jokes

What did the DJ order from the deli?

A club sandwich with extra beets.

Why do strippers look better in the club than outside the club?

Black lights matter.

Stripper Jokes More Stripper Jokes

What secret society do strippers work for?

The Illuminaughty.

What do you call a Polish dancer?

A stripper