Club Jokes

What did the baby otter say when it walked into the club?

Ouch

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What did the bacon say to the sandwich?

This club can't even handle me right now

How do you keep a club exclusively for straight edgers?

You weed out the rest

Why couldn't the Mod get into the club?

He never got banned.

What club cancels their meeting everytime?

The vegan club

Why are seals such homebodies?

Because clubbing isn't any fun.

What do you call 500 old white guys chasing a black man with clubs?

The PGA tour.

What do Tiger Woods and baby seals have in common?

They both get clubbed by Norwegians...

What happened when the Eskimo teens went clubbing?

They got new fur coats.

What do animal poachers do in their spare time?

They go clubbing.

What did the DJ order from the deli?

A club sandwich with extra beets.

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What do physics majors do when they hit the club?

They torque it..

Why did a seal go to the bar?

Because he didn't want to go clubbing.

What is the first rule of Womans fight club?

Never tell anyone what are you so mad about

Why do strippers look better in the club than outside the club?

Black lights matter.

What's the difference between seal hunters and teenagers?

There's none, both like clubbing.

How are you baby?

I am in bed and thinking about you ... And you my dear - I am at a club ... And sitting right behind you!!

What's the difference between fight club and veganism?

You don't talk about fight club.

How can Euchre and Marriage be similar?

Sometimes you start out all hearts and diamonds, but end up wishing you had a club and a spade.

What do 1% of racist people do?

They are making clubs like the KKK The other 99% are hidden here making bad jokes

Who wants to go to Florida with me?

I heard the clubs are to die for.

Bad at golf?

Join the club.

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Stripper Jokes More Stripper Jokes

What do you call it when a stripper does charity work?

Pro work

What do characters at Disney World and strippers have in common?

No touching!

Pun Jokes More Pun Jokes

Why did the dad make the joke?

For the pun of it.

What's better than a rose on your piano?

Tulips on your organ EDIT: This blew up. (No pun intended)

Sandwich Jokes More Sandwich Jokes

How do you tell a transgender from a real woman?

The quality of the sandwich.

What does a memelord put on his sandwich?

L-mayo

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

What's being in love feel like?

You know when someone cancels plans you wanted to cancel anyway Almost as good as that.

What can I bring to your party?

Friend: A six pack. does 10 crunches cancels

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

What did Vincent van Gogh call himself when he joined the Justice League?

The Starry Knight

Why did the little pig try to join the Navy?

He loved to sing "Oinkers Aweight"

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did Ahmed take his clock to school?

He wanted to see time fly

What is a centipedes's favorite Beatle song?

I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand...

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you mean I can't drink alcohol with this medication?

You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.

Why do Polish people keep empty bottles in their refrigerator?

For people that don't want anything to drink

Frog Jokes More Frog Jokes

What advice did the frog give to the condom manufacturer?

Rib it.

What's green and red and goes 100 mph?

A frog in a blender.