Why is Arjen Robben not being invited to Alfredo Di Stefanos funeral?

They're scared he'll try to dive in the box.

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What's red, 10 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I try to put it in her mouth?

Her miscarriage. sorry.

How does a sloth hang itself?

By trying to jump rope.

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Why does Kylo Ren decline all my raid invites in WoW?

Cause he been solo.

Why don't Pirates get invited to Birthday parties?

Because they always steal doubloons

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas?

GLOVES! Just kidding, he hasn't opened the box yet.

Why are Toblerone's triangular shaped?

So they fit in the box.

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What did you say?

Me: Judge Did you just reverse my sentence *Stage dives into cheering jury*

Why is Arjen Robben not being invited to Alfredo Di Stefanos funeral?

They're scared he'll try to dive in the box.