Why would I want to talk to your baby?

On the phone. It's a baby. If I wanted to hear random noises when I talk, I have a husband for that.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do you call a deaf quadriplegic?

Whatever you want

What is the similarity between tight rope walking and an old lady giving you head?

You don't want to look down.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?

3.99 a minute.

What's the funniest thing the rock said to the geologist ?

Nothing. Because rocks don't talk and geology's not funny.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

Why don't babies work?

Because they're all out of cervix

What's the difference between a cry baby and Dallas Cowboys fans?

Eventually the baby stops crying

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Who wants to hear an awesome knock knock joke?

Okay, you start.

Whats th first joke you remember hearing or that you told as a kid?

Mine is: What is the white stuff in bird poop? (That is also bird poop.) edit: til you can't edit the topic to fix spelling errors...

Phone Jokes More Phone Jokes

How long has your car been doing that?

Me: Hubs: The engine smoking at a stoplight Me: I dont know, I look at my phone at lights.

What do you call a doctor who is always on a phone?

An oncologist

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What does the husband say to his wife whose nose is bleeding?

Nothing, he already said it twice.

Why was the lizard upset with her husband?

Because he had a reptile dysfunction. ... Okay bye now