Charlie Sheen Jokes

What grocery store does Charlie Sheen frequently visit?

Rite Aid

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How did Charlie Sheen contract HIV?

By banging 7-gram rocks.

Why are there three letters missing from the alphabet?

Because Charlie Sheen has HIV.

This joke may have profanity.

What did Charlie Sheen say when he won the Tour de France?

Schwinning!

Who's the best person to invite over for Christmas?

Charlie Sheen. Because you know it's GUARANTEED to be a white Christmas when he's around.

Where does Charlie Sheen shop?

At Winners.

What do you call Charlie Sheen in a wheelchair?

ROLAIDS

What's Charlie Sheens middle name?

Washingma Charlie Washingma Sheen

How long does Charlie Sheen last in bed?

Two and a half minutes.

Why is Charlie Sheen always seen smiling?

Because he's so damn positive!

Why can't Charlie Sheen finish the alphabet?

Because when he gets to 'P' it burns.

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What do you call Charlie Sheen's brother if he were a financial advisor?

Emilio Investevez. Fun game/running joke friends in college used to play. Wondering if Reddit would enjoy the game too.

What's the difference between the Notre Dame Fighting Irish and Charlie Sheen?

Charlie Sheen's winning.