How did the polish terrorist burn his lips?

Burned them on a cars tailpipe when he tried blowing it up.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What do you say when Kim Kardashian burns to the ground?

Look at all that ash...

What happens when someone spills really hot coffee on you?

You will get burned, you idiot.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Where can you find Jhene Aiko at Bed Peace?

At bed, blunt, and beyond. Bada tssss. I tried.

How many countries does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Five. Germany to start it, France to try and then give up almost immediately, Italy to start, give up, and try again from the other side, America to finish it and claim credit for the whole thing, and Switzerland to sit in the dark and pretend that nothing happened.

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

Why did the angry skeptic keep ignoring official reports about the eventual release of Half-Life 3?

He was blowing off Steam

How do you keep your hair from blowing everywhere when you drive in a convertible?

Cross your legs

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

How does a deaf Gynecologist communicate with his patients?

He reads lips.

Why can't you hear a dog whistle?

Because they have a hard time puckering their lips the right way.

Polish Jokes More Polish Jokes

Where did the frog say his family came from?

They are German and a tad-Polish"

How do you stop a Polish army on horseback?

A: Turn off the carousel.