How do you keep your Thanksgiving guests from falling asleep on your couch?

Infuse the gravy with cocaine.

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Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What did the horse say when he fell over?

Help! I've fallen and I can't giddy up."

Why did Mary fell from the swing ?

Because she hasn't got arms !

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

What does the hippie bum say when you tell him he can no longer sleep on your couch?

Namaste

What is the difference between a black guy and a couch?

One can actually support a family.

Thanksgiving Jokes More Thanksgiving Jokes

What does Saddam want for Thanksgiving ?

A: Turkey.

What does the Incredible Hulk bring to the Avenger's Thanksgiving meal?

Smashed potatoes.

Cocaine Jokes More Cocaine Jokes

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine &amp a small child?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window...

What's the difference between a four year old and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

Gravy Jokes More Gravy Jokes

How do you keep your Thanksgiving guests from falling asleep on your couch?

Infuse the gravy with cocaine.

What are you wearing?

ME: *nodding and sniffing myself* Mashed potatoes with gravy.