What does the hippie bum say when you tell him he can no longer sleep on your couch?

Namaste

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Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What's the definition of innocence?

A nun working in a condom factory thinking she's making sleeping bags for mice.

Why was little Jimmy fishing in the well?

Because Tom had previously drowned in the well and everyone said "Tom is sleeping with the fishes."

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How many times we need to tell you that she died?

Man: It pleases me to listen that she died.

What's a difference between a teacher and a train?

The teacher tells you to spit you gum out. The train says, "Chew, chew, chew!"

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

How does that make you feel?

ME: "Mphh mophh wampph." T: Again, this works better if you don't lie face down on the couch.

What did the hippie say when somebody told him to get off of their couch?

Namaste.

Namaste Jokes More Namaste Jokes

What did the yoga teacher say when someone asked if she wanted to leave the party early?

Namaste

How does a yoga instructor turn down an invite?

Namaste home tonight.