How does an Alcoholic teach the ABC's to their children?

Backwards.

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Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What are children generally better at then adults?

Giving the pope an errection

How does a black mother tell her children apart?

She remembers them by their last names.

Alcoholic Jokes More Alcoholic Jokes

What do you call an alcoholic with Parkinson's?

Shakespeare (say it out loud)

What is similar about a necrophiliac and an alcoholic?

They both like to crack open a cold one

Teach Jokes More Teach Jokes

What should you know before you teach your dog a new trick?

You should know more than your dog.

What about breakfast teaches us the difference between "interested" and "committed"?

In a ham and egg sandwich, the chicken had an interest, but the pig is committed.

Abc Jokes More Abc Jokes

How does an Alcoholic teach the ABC's to their children?

Backwards.

Where did the piglets study their ABC's?

At a school for higher loining.