How many beers did you have while I was gone?

Me: Two. 4-year-old: It was nine. Teaching her to count was a mistake.

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Count Jokes More Count Jokes

What does a redneck do after she bangs her second cousin?

She quits counting.

How many legs does the dog have?

4 y.o: Five Me: There's something wrong with your counting. 4: There's something wrong with the dog.

Beer Jokes More Beer Jokes

What's the difference between the dog and the fox?

About four beers

A ham sandwhich walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says...

I'm sorry, we don't serve food here

Mistake Jokes More Mistake Jokes

What do you call a Muslim who always makes mistakes?

Errorist

How many SRSers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They wait for the electrician to make a mistake and yell at them for doing it wrong.

Teach Jokes More Teach Jokes

What do you need to teach a blonde who never had an accident in 20 years?

Second gear.

Why did the hippy teach the lumberjack calculus?

So he'd use natural logs!

4 Year Old Jokes More 4 Year Old Jokes

What's the difference between a 4 year old boy and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

What does God smell like?

Me: 4-year-old: Me: Nachos. 4-year-old: With cheese