What happened when Isaac Newton met the apple?

He found the apple was a surprisingly down-to-Earth kinda guy.

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens to a woman who falls down the stairs?

Nothing, as long as she doesn't drop my beers

Why was the UKIP voter angry?

Because he didn't like the look of the Poles (for this to make sense, pretend the UK election hasn't happened yet)

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

What's red like a strawberry, hard like beef jerky, smells like vinegar, and is found under your bed?

Me neither. Help.

What do you call a dog that can find something that's not there?

A Labracadabrador

Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

Why can you always trust a bee without wings?

Because it's down to earth.

Why did the Moon break up with Earth?

The Moon said they were slowly drifting apart.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What do Apple and Blackberry have in common?

Neither one has Jobs.

How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, because they charge you $500 for the iLightbulb.

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

Who's there ! Cereal ! Cereal who ?

Cereal pleasure to meet you !

How do salespeople traditionally greet each other?

Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm better than you."

Isaac Newton Jokes More Isaac Newton Jokes

Why didn't Isaac Newton drink wine?

He knew better than to drink and derive.

Why was Sir Isaac Newton buried at Westminster Abbey?

Because he was dead.