What would George Washington do if he was alive today?

Probably get suffocated in his collapsed coffin

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How would you like your school girls today, Mr. Holmes?

Elementary, my dear Watson.

What would George Washington do if he was alive today?

Probably get suffocated in his collapsed coffin

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When did your parents divorce?

ME: No, they were hoarders, and the second floor collapsed.

What do you call it when a sewer collapses on itself?

Sewercide

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What's George Washington's least favorite flower?

Lie-lacs!

What did George Washington have to do with Gorillas?

As little as possible dummy!

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How do you suffocate a redneck?

Tape his mouth shut.

Whats the emergency?

My wife is suffocating me -Literally or figuratively sir Well thats a stupid question. How would I be talking