Collapse Jokes

What did the Mexican say when his house collapsed on him?

Hey, get off me homes !

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What do you call it when a sewer collapses on itself?

Sewercide

Where does it hurt?

Me: *Points to heart* Nurse: Awwww that is so cute! Me. *COLLAPSES FROM HEART ATTACK*

What did the engineer say to the bridge after it had collapsed?

I trussed you.

Why did it take so long to find the bodies of the black firefighters after the building they were in caught fire and collapsed?

Cause the building collapsed, duh.

When did your parents divorce?

ME: No, they were hoarders, and the second floor collapsed.

What do you get if you cross a spider and an elephant ?

I'm not sure but if you see one walking across the ceiling then run before it collapses !

What did Gorbachev say when the USSR collapsed?

So ve it."

What would George Washington do if he was alive today?

Probably get suffocated in his collapsed coffin

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What did the spider say when he broke his new web ?

Darn it !

What does Spider-man wear when it gets cold out?

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What's the difference between the inverse of sec(o) and the smallest region in the former Ottoman Empire?

One is cos(o), the other is Kosovo

Where do Turkish people go to purchase their furniture?

The Ottoman Empire.

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Why do women have babies?

Because it hurts and they deserve it

What did the router say to the doctor?

It hurts when IP.

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What do you call a Mexican bodybuilder who runs out of protein?

No Whey Jose.

What did the chopped wood say to the tree?

Run!

House Jokes More House Jokes

What happens when the President dies?

The Vice President takes over. What happens when the Vice President dies? The Speaker of the House takes over. What happens when the Speaker of the House dies? You go to Radio Shack and buy a new speaker.

What is a homeless man's favorite type of music?

House music

Heart Attack Jokes More Heart Attack Jokes

Why did the black man have a heart attack?

afrosclerosis

What will he have?

Student: "A heart attack."

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When did your parents divorce?

ME: No, they were hoarders, and the second floor collapsed.

What do you call a bee that can't make up his mind?

Second Caribou: A maybee.

Home Jokes More Home Jokes

Why did the dolphin run away from home to start a new life?

He felt he had lost his sense of porpoise.

What do mice do when they're at home ?

Mousework !