When ur at chipotle n u ask for guac and they say "its extra is that ok?

if u say its not ok they give it to u for free

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How did Paul, the octopus, originally die?

Torres went and asked Paul proudly, "How many goals will I end up with after thia this World Cup " Paul died laughing.

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!

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What is in common between a napkin and a person?

If you sleep with a person, he/she is ur nap-kin.

Why y'all checkin' me?

Ur the ones with a pot leaf on your flag!!"

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

What kind of tools do I need to make a cake?

Him: The fact that you're calling ingredients tools means u shouldnt be in charge of this.

How does a poor man watch TV?

with binoculars. u know, he has to watch whatever the neighbours are watching.

Guac Jokes More Guac Jokes

When an avocado and a duck mate, what sound does the offspring make?

Guac!

When ur at chipotle n u ask for guac and they say "its extra is that ok?

if u say its not ok they give it to u for free