Why couldn't the cat speak?

A: The dog taped his mouth.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why are you showing me photos?

I'm a dog."

Why are dogs always SENSITIVE?

Because they have tears in their eyes

Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

How do you speak such good English?

I dunno 200 years of colonialism and eurocentric education, how do you know so little history "

How do cats speak to people?

They commeownicate.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

Why are there no cats on Mars?

Because there is no oxygen and they'd die from UV radiation, you idiot.

Why do you need a licence for a dog and not for a cat ?

Cats can't drive !

Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

What kind of soldier doesn't need bullets?

The kind of soldier that's always shooting his mouth off.

What is juicy on the inside, dry on the outside, and has "apple" in it?

A roasted baby with an apple in its mouth.

Tape Jokes More Tape Jokes

Why do University of Arkansas graduates tape their diplomas to the windshields of their cars?

So they can park in handicapped spaces.

What kind of tape do kidnappers use?

abDUCT tape