Why did the old man hate using the new chip cards?

He's trying to watch his sodium intake.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why did Lucy fall off the swing?

Jimmy pushed her... Which is a shame because she was getting used to swinging without arms.

How much do used batteries cost?

Nothing, they are free of charge.

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Why are people who vape always trying to chase after bigger clouds?

More storage space.

Why don't old men like old women?

Ever tried to peel apart a grilled cheese sandwich

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How do you teach a girl math?

Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, give her a square root and watch her multiply.

Who can watch an R rated movie but not a PG?

Batman

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Why German Loves Americans why do Germans love Americans?

because Americans are the most hated people in the world now.

Why does ISIS only drink drip coffee?

Because they hate French Press!

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What do call an old man that asks questions?

Pop Quiz

Why doesn't an old man ever go down on his old wife?

Ever opened a grilled-cheese sandwich?