Why did the Russian man keep making excuses?

He was just stalin for time

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Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

What did Vladimir name his member?

Put-in. (In a Russian accent)

How do the Russian people feel about their government?

They're Putin up with it.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

How do you know when it's time to get a new dishwasher?

When the old one expects you to "do your share"

Excuse Jokes More Excuse Jokes

How do you hit those high notes?

Adam Levine: I sold my soul to the devil. Interviewer: Excuse me Adam Levine: Practice.

Why do the rich enjoy tending to their gardens?

Because the they have an excuse to buy hose

Stalin Jokes More Stalin Jokes

Why are cars in Russia so slow?

Because they are always stalin.

Why didn't The Cold War happen?

Russia kept Stalin it

Russian Man Jokes More Russian Man Jokes

Why did the Russian man get food poisoning?

Because NE-coli.

What do you call a Russian man with three testicles?

Mr. Whodyounickabollockov