Why did the soccer player have to ask for a bib at the restaurant?

Because he was Messi

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What's black and white and can't turn around in a corridor?

A nun with a javelin in her throat. (The only joke I can ever recall when asked for one. Told to me by my art teacher in Grade 11. Needless to say, he was my favourite teacher)

What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of a Planned Parenthood?

Going inside to ask for a coat hanger.

Restaurant Jokes More Restaurant Jokes

Why did the cannibal leave the restaurant?

Because he got cold feet.

Why did the bird go to the restaurant?

Tweet!

Soccer Player Jokes More Soccer Player Jokes

Why don't soccer players get hot while running?

Because they hve so many fans

What did the soccer player shout to the baker who's cakes kept sticking to the tin?

LINE IT!"

Messi Jokes More Messi Jokes

How do you lose a Football championship penalty shootout?

You Messi-up

Why did the soccer player have to ask for a bib at the restaurant?

Because he was Messi