Why does your face look like a donut?

me 30 minutes into dieting

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What is the definition of diplomacy?

The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.

What reddit page has that link/picture you're looking for?

The next page.

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Why is it good to know someone who kicks ducks in the face?

Because they're always footing the bill.

What's the difference... between a gazpacho bean and a chickpea?

I've never had a gazpacho bean on my face.

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Where do Irish people go for breakfast?

Drunkin Donuts

Why does your face look like a donut?

me 30 minutes into dieting

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How to raise a kid?

I injected my kid with yeast and put him in the oven for 30 minutes but he didn't rise. Any suggestions

What do performing bears at the circus get for lunch?

30 minutes.