Why is everyone afraid of Vladimir Putin?

Because Vlad is Putin everyone in their place. I'll let myself out.

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Let Jokes More Let Jokes

Where do we go?

Me: Left Axl: Where do we go now Me: Straight. Axl: Oh, where do we go now Me: Damn it, Axl, let me drive!

How many dead-heads does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They just let it burn out and follow it around for twenty years.

Putin Jokes More Putin Jokes

What will Putin be having for Thanksgiving dinner?

Turkey.

What do you call it when the Russian president sits on a box of crackers?

Putin on the Ritz

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

Why do the Germans use commas in place of decimal points?

Because it makes 6,000,000 seem like a much smaller number.

What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards?

You see a woman learn her place.

Vlad Jokes More Vlad Jokes

What did the Englishman call the hilarious Slav?

Top Vlad.

What do you call Dracula when he goes swimming?

Aqua-Vlad

Vladimir Putin Jokes More Vladimir Putin Jokes

What is Vladimir Putin's favourite subject?

Computin science

What is Vladimir Putin's favourite drink?

White Russian, Straight