Why is everyone afraid of Vladimir Putin?

Because Vlad is Putin everyone in their place. I'll let myself out.

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Let Jokes More Let Jokes

Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she will "Let It Go.

Why does Mona Lisa smiling?

The Mona Lisa is smiling because Chuck Norris let her live.

Putin Jokes More Putin Jokes

What did Putin say when the world got mad at him for invading the Ukraine?

Cri-me-a river!"

Why does it smell so bad in Russia?

Everybody loves Putin!

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

Which place has the strongest gravity in the whole universe?

Bed

What does Michael Bolton say when he walks into an elevator?

This place rocks!"

Vlad Jokes More Vlad Jokes

What do you call an asthmatic vampire?

Vlad The Inhaler.

What do you call Dracula when he goes swimming?

Aqua-Vlad

Vladimir Putin Jokes More Vladimir Putin Jokes

What is Vladimir Putin's favourite drink?

White Russian, Straight

How does Vladimir Putin like his Thanksgiving turkey?

Nuked