Vlad Jokes

What do you get when you cross Henry VIII and Vlad the Impaler?

Executed.

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What do you call an asthmatic vampire?

Vlad The Inhaler.

Why is everyone afraid of Vladimir Putin?

Because Vlad is Putin everyone in their place. I'll let myself out.

What do you call Dracula when he goes swimming?

Aqua-Vlad

What did the Englishman call the hilarious Slav?

Top Vlad.

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Let Jokes More Let Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a kilo of Coke?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a kilo fall out of a window

What do beekeepers say when they go to work?

Alright, let's get down to beeswax!"

Putin Jokes More Putin Jokes

What did Putin say to the U.S. and E.U. after invading Ukraine?

Crimea river

What does the Russian President's wife scream during foreplay?

Putin! Putin!

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

What did the french chef say when the cheese factory exploded?

What did the french chef say when the cheese factory exploded? Looks like we have debris all over the place

What did the physicist say to the two women he was trying to pick up at the bar?

Do you ladies wanna go back to my place and conduct a double slit experiment?"

Inhaler Jokes More Inhaler Jokes

What do you call an asthmatic vampire?

Vlad The Inhaler.

Why did the little boy use his inhaler?

No wheezin'"

Execute Jokes More Execute Jokes

Why did the captain execute the pastry chef?

Because his orders were to shoot all desserters.

Why is an abortionist good to have on your team?

If you conceive something, they can execute it.

Henry Viii Jokes More Henry Viii Jokes

How does Henry VIII like his coffee?

Decap.

What do you get when you cross Henry VIII and Vlad the Impaler?

Executed.

Dracula Jokes More Dracula Jokes

What does Dracula say to his victims?

It's been nice gnawing you.

Why is no one friends with Dracula?

Cause hes a pain in the neck.

Swim Jokes More Swim Jokes

Where do Old Egyptian people go to Swim?

The Senile River

Why is the bottom of the ocean so dark?

Black people can't swim. -.-