Why is your shirt on wrong?

Daughter: I think you old people call it: "second base"

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What does Dave Grohl say when he thinks there's a stalker in his house?

IS SOMEONE OUT ON THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VESTIBULE?"

Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?

A: She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

Why is food better than men?

Because you don't have to wait an hour for seconds.

How many frames per second does it take to screw in a light bulb?

30 because that's peasants work.

Daughter Jokes More Daughter Jokes

What do you mean the school must be haunted ?

Daughter: Well the principal kept going on about the school spirit.

What do you call a dead skunk?

A stunk. My daughter made this up when she was about 7 years old. I thought it was incredible clever.

Shirt Jokes More Shirt Jokes

What did the shirt say to the pants?

What's up, britches.

When is the only time when No shirt no shorts no shoes gets you service?

If you're a surfer and you're getting head.

Old People Jokes More Old People Jokes

How do old people check up to see how their friends are doing?

They look in the obituary

What kid of music do old people listen to?

Hip-Pop