Why use words you don't understand in your tweets?

It just makes you look photosynthesis.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of currency do they use in space?

Starbucks

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?

You can't use a pitchfork on the bowling balls.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why does a white guy go to a brothel?

For pleasure. Why does a black guy go to a brothel He's looking for his mother.

Why do walruses go to tupperware parties?

They are always looking for a tight seal.

Understand Jokes More Understand Jokes

What did phenolphthalein do when he couldn't understand his Chemistry homework?

He just added Acetic Acid until it became clear.

Why couldn't the scientist understand what the photon was saying?

Because the photon was incoherent.

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

What's the sharpest thing in the word?

A fart. It goes right through your pants and doesn't leave a hole.

What is atheism?

A non-prophet religion Edit: Replace the word "religion" with "set of beliefs" if you're picky about that sort of thing

Photosynthesis Jokes More Photosynthesis Jokes

What do you call a picture of an electric piano?

Photosynthesis!

Why use words you don't understand in your tweets?

It just makes you look photosynthesis.

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

Why did you leave your last job?

I had a typo in a tweet. "Mistakes happen!" -I worked for Yahoo Finance. "Thanks for coming in. Bye"

What do you call it again where you think of a tweet while you're offline so you have to say it out loud?

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