How did the blind man know Santa was in his house?

He felt his presents.

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Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

Why does santa say ho ho ho?

Because three hos are better than one!

What's Santa's favorite snack?

A crisp Pringle

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why don't mathematicians ever get blackout drunk?

They know their limits.

What did the double hand amputee get for Christmas?

I don't know, he hasn't managed to open it yet.

Present Jokes More Present Jokes

Why is toilet paper no good for wrapping presents?

Cos it's tear-able.

What's the downside of being a redneck kid at Christmas?

You only get presents from one set of grandparents.

House Jokes More House Jokes

Why is a ghost like an empty house?

Because there's no body there!

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?

Because he was Snowden

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What did the picture say to the Judge?

I WAS FRAMED! I just now made that up. I feel good about this one! Skip

How did the french guy feel when he got hit by a piece of bread?

He felt pain.

Blind Man Jokes More Blind Man Jokes

How does the blind man know when to stop wiping his arse?

I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

How do you make a blind man mad?

Awwwwwww. Look at them pretty flowers.