How do you get your girlfriend to stop smoking??

Slow down and grab some lube!!

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Lube Jokes More Lube Jokes

What do ghosts use for lube?

Rectoplasm...

What do you do when your wife starts smoking?

Slow down and apply lube

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What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down, and possibly use a lubricant

What did Keanu Reeves say to slow down his horse?

Whoa.

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How do you stop a thundering herd of Apes?

Hold up your arm and say "Go back you didn't say 'May I'"

What job do you never stop training for?

Conductor

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What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before they got married?

Feyonce.

What made the vampire a gentlemen?

They would always ask their girlfriend before they came inside.

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What is a man's ultimate shame?

When he runs into a wall with a hard-on and grabs his nose first!

What Would Justin Bieber Do?

scream like a little girl, grab nonexistent testicles & run away awkwardly.