How many helicopters does it take for White House aides to go play a round of golf?

A: Depends on how many were photographed.

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Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What's the difference between a tv remote and a newborn?

You can't play football with the remote.

What is Polish roulette?

It's similar to Russian roulette, but instead of a revolver it's played with an automatic pistol.

Depend Jokes More Depend Jokes

How much does a plumber make in an hour?

It depends on how much crack he can produce.

What do old people always keep in their back pocket?

Depends.

Helicopter Jokes More Helicopter Jokes

Why wouldn't Pope Pius bless any helicopters when they were first manufactured?

Because whenever one started up, the big blades would go "wop...wop... wop" and the little blades would go "guineaguineaguinea".

What do you call a helicopter mixed with a rhino?

Well hell-if-i-know!

Round Jokes More Round Jokes

How many volunteers do we have for my evil army?

384 my liege" "Ok, round them up" "400 my liege"

How do you stop a baby from crawling round in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

Golf Jokes More Golf Jokes

Why should you bring two pairs of pants when you golf?

In case you get a hole-in-one (stolen from some girl at school)

Why is golf named "golf"?

Because all the other fore letter words were taken (Thanks to ... this now makes sense...)

Photograph Jokes More Photograph Jokes

What's the difference between young girls and photographs?

After putting them in a dark room, you have to wait for the photograph to fully develop.

What do you call someone who photographs fish?

A school shooter

White House Jokes More White House Jokes

What happens when the president of the United States has to use the bathroom?

The state of alert in the White House rises to Defecate 2.

When will there be a woman in the White House?

A: When Hillary leaves town.