How many times should you try starting your snowblower before you realize it's not going to start?

According to my neighbor it's 458 times.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

When did this start?

and the gentleman replies, "When did what start "

How did the flea learn to use the internet?

He had to start from scratch.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied?

Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!

What are your thoughts on it?

ME: trying to impress her I have 6 wives

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?

None. According to Trump, they outsourced it to India & China.

What was the #1 summer blockbuster, according to Cat Fancy magazine?

Mad Manx: Furry Road

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

Finally realized why my plant sits around doing nothing all day...

He loves his pot.

What's the worst part about making out with a perfect 10?

The cold feeling on your lips when you realize you're kissing the mirror

Neighbor Jokes More Neighbor Jokes

What's the similarity between your wife and a tin roof in a hurricane?

If you didn't nail them properly they'll go see your neighbor

What word starts with "n" and you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

Snowblower Jokes More Snowblower Jokes

How do you turn an old dishwasher into a snowblower?

You give her a shovel and tell her to get to work.

Why did the snowman pull down his pants?

Because he saw the snowblower coming