What did the vampire do to stop his son biting his nails ?

He cut all his fingers off !

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What do you call it when fish stop having babies?

Minnow-pause

What are you typing?

Let me guess. Oh wait, stop right there, I know what it is. It's not that Okay wait.. I know it, I know it!" -Google.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

What did the Romans say to each other after crucifying Jesus?

Nailed it!"

Why didn't Jesus get into college?

Because he got nailed on the boards.

Bite Jokes More Bite Jokes

What do you get when a vampire bites a goblin?

A Hemogoblin

What do you call a Nun that bites her nails?

A bad Habit. I'll see myself out.

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What is the hardest part of cuting a baby in half with a straight razor?

My erection.

Why was the umbilical cord sad?

He got cut from the naval base.

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

What's the difference between a tropical beach and a priest?

One gets sun on your skin and the other gets skin on your son.

What did the mom say when she found out her son was going to be a evil spy?

Abort mission!

Finger Jokes More Finger Jokes

How many fingers do I have up?

a gynecologist who thinks he's really funny

How did a blind girl burn her fingers?

A. Reading the waffle iron

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

Why do vampires hate arguments?

Because they make themselves cross.

What did one vampire say to the other vampire?

Is that you coffin