What do ghosts use to predict the future?

Horror-scopes!

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why do towels get dirty?

If we use towels just to dry ourselves after washing off dirt and what not. Why do they get dirty??

What is it that is yours , but others use it more than you ?

Your name

Ghost Jokes More Ghost Jokes

What do ghosts wear?

Boo Jeans

What did the ghost say to the other ghost at the Halloween party?

Let's get sheet-faced!

Future Jokes More Future Jokes

What do you call a crocodile/robot sent from the future to save the past?

Termigator (jesus christ this one's even worse than the last)

What would I do if Future tried talking to me?

I'd autotune him out. :)

Predict Jokes More Predict Jokes

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

What do you call a morbidly obese person who can predict the future?

A four-chin teller.