What do you get if you play a C&amp?

W song backwards? Your wife back, your house back, your car back, and your dog back.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you call a dog from another planet?

A dal-martian

Why are dogs and engineers alike ?

They both have intelligent eyes, but neither can talk properly.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

How many pull-ups can you do?

Me: 22. Wife: How many with witnesses Me: Almost 1.

What does Santa say when he meets your wife, your sister and your mother?

HO HO HO, Merry Christmas!

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What kind of Mechanics fix and break your car at the same time?

Quantum Mechanics.

Why did Bruce Jenner crash his car?

Because she's a woman.

House Jokes More House Jokes

Why did the sheep move house?

The neighbours were baaastsrds.

What do women and hand grenades have in common?

When you pull the ring off, your house goes away

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why did they have to stop playing water-polo in Poland?

All the horses drowned

Why does Willem Dafoe play a villain in a lot of movies?

Duh. Cause he's da foe.