What does a child without arms get for x-mas?

gloves! nah don't know, it hasn't opened the present yet

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call Mike Tyson without any arms?

Whatever you want

What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and is on fire?

Bernie.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know a presidential candidate is lying?

Their lips are moving.

How did Canada pick its name?

There were two Canadians and an American. They put letters in a hat and drew. They got "C-eh", "N-eh", "D-eh". The American didn't know what was going on, but he relayed the message. I know i need to work on my execution.

Present Jokes More Present Jokes

How did the blind man know Santa was in his house?

He felt his presents.

How do you know when Santa Claus is nearby ?

You can feel his presents ...

X Jokes More X Jokes

How are relationships like algebra?

You look at your X and try to find out Y

How many X does it take to lightbulb?

Karma?

Child Jokes More Child Jokes

How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't need a lightbulb when I have the furnace ready.

Why parents don't allow their children to listen to M. Jackson songs?

because they are very touching

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How have you got that body?

I said, "I don't know officer, I just opened the boot and there she was."

What do you call presents after you've opened them?

Pasts