What happened to the guy who grabbed the Viagra instead of the Allegra?

he had a hard time with his allergies

This joke may have profanity.

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What happened when the bike ran over a nail?

It popped a wheelie.

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She choked.

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A "no one will ever believe me".

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I'm staunchly pro-volone.

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You're really bustin' Machops!

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He was a little horse

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What does a Muslim with allergies say?

Al-achoo Akbar.

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Aye-drops

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They grab the stack of un-signed adoption papers, stand on top of them, then proceed to change the light bulb.

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This is the end of me !

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Who's there ! Allegra ! Allegra who ?

Allegra is broken !