What is the philosophy of a necrophiliac?

Sit back, relax and crack open a cold one

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Crack Jokes More Crack Jokes

What did the fish scream when its tank cracked?

Dam-it!"

What do you call a duck addicted to crack?

A quack head. What is a ducks favorite snack Quackers. Why couldn't the duck drive his car His windshield was quacked.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What's the best way to get King Kong to sit up and beg?

Wave a two-ton banana in front of his nose.

What do Eskimos get from sitting on a block of ice?

A. Polaroids.

Philosophy Jokes More Philosophy Jokes

What do you call the corner of the market that specializes in philosophy?

A Nietzsche market!

Why shouldn't you tell a philosophy major a joke?

They don't find them Hume-erous.

Necrophiliac Jokes More Necrophiliac Jokes

What's the best part of being a necrophiliac?

In the bedroom, it doesn't take much effort to make your lover's jaw drop.

What kind of an erection does a necrophiliac get?

Mourning wood! :)

Relax Jokes More Relax Jokes

What can relax you and drown you at the same time?

A one-hour facial.

Where do French lawyers like to relax?

The J'accusi