What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad?

One trains the mind the other minds the train.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a lesbian and a straight girl?

Four drinks.

What's the difference between Americans and yogurt?

If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years it'll grow a culture

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What did the American accountant say to his British counterpart?

Mind the GAAP.

What's warm, white, and I drink almost every night?

Warm milk before bed... Get your mind out of the gutter!

Teacher Jokes More Teacher Jokes

What should a teacher take if he's run down?

The number of the car that hit him.

What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

Student: A teacher!

Train Jokes More Train Jokes

What do you call a doctor who is trained in neurosurgery and is covering for a gynecologist?

A pervert.

How do locomotives know where they're going?

Lots of training

Conductor Jokes More Conductor Jokes

Why did the train get hit by lighting?

Because of the conductor.

What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!