What secret organization does Pinnochio work for?

Wooden you like to know

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How can you know that you are insecure about what other people think of your post?

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What do you suppose Ray Rice's fiance' did when he got her home from knocking her out?

The dishes if she knows what's good for her!

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How would you like that cooked?

gets right up in waitresses face* With frickin fire, obviously

What dressing would you like on your salad?

Me: Ice cream

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How is a computer like an air conditioner?

They both stop working properly when you open windows.

A grocery store cashier asked if I would like my milk in a bag.

I told her 'No, thanks. The carton works fine.'

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What is every young ladys ultimate Disney fantasy?

To sit on Pinnochios face and hope he tells lies.

Why does Pinnochio always get an erection when he's in a forest?

Because he has a woodpecker!