When do you kick a midget in the nuts?

When he stands next to your girlfriend and says her hair smells nice.

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why did the cow get a job at Google?

Because she was out standing in her field.

How does Ohm conduct an orchestra?

Standing on his head!

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What's the difference.... Between my girlfriend and santa?

Some people actually believe santa exist.

What did the Swedish chef say to his girlfriend when he found out she was pregnant?

Abort - Bort - Bort!

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

How do you make Manischewitz Wine?

Kick him in the nuts.

What do you call a nut on a wall?

A walnut! What do you call a nut at the beach A beech nut! What do you call a nut in the toilet A peanut!!

Hair Jokes More Hair Jokes

Why did cavemen drag their women around by the hair?

Because if they dragged them by the ankles, they'd fill up with muck.

What's grosser than gross?

When a midget walks past and says your hair smells nice!

Smell Jokes More Smell Jokes

What tastes good but doesn't smell good?

A tongue. Hehe

What did Nirvana say when they drove past a burning school bus?

Smells Like Teen Spirits"

Kick Jokes More Kick Jokes

Why was the ladybird kicked out of the forest?

Because she was a litter bug.

What's the difference between Russian football fans and an old drunkard in a bar at closing time?

Kicking the old drunkard out won't start world war III.

Midget Jokes More Midget Jokes

When is it okay to kick a midget in the balls?

When he tells you that your wife's hair smells good.

What do you call a midget psychic running from the cops?

A small medium at large!