Where did the universe attend college?

At the university.

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Attend Jokes More Attend Jokes

Why wouldn't the dog attend the Veterans Day Parade?

There were too many vets.

Why didn't the sun have to attend university?

It's already got thousands of degrees.

College Jokes More College Jokes

Why didn't the sun go to college?

It already had 10 thousand degrees.

What do you call a can after it completes college?

A graduated cylinder.

Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

What's the biggest lie of the Universe?

I Have Read and Agree to the Terms of Service."

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.

University Jokes More University Jokes

What subject did the Warlock major in at University?

Fel-osophy

What do you call the grounds of a university that specializes in teaching neuroscience to hippopotamuses?

Hippocampus!