University Jokes

Why did the University of Kentucky have to put AstroTurf down on the stadium?

To keep the cheerleaders from grazing at halftime.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Where do mushrooms go to university?

The mycollege.

What subject did the Warlock major in at University?

Fel-osophy

Why your oven doesn't attend an university?

It already has at least hundred degrees

What's the difference between a degree in Theoretical Physics and a theoretical degree in Physics?

One is relevant and can get you a job. The other you went to university for.

What do you say to someone who studied media at university?

Can I have fries with that please?

Which university has the most muslims?

SUNY

How many OU (University of Oklahoma) coaches does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They aren't about to change a bulb when flipping a switch has worked for 15 years.

Where do galaxies go to college?

University! Happy 1st day back to school to many of you :)

Why did the oven go back to University?

To get another degree. My sister thought it up and found it so funny she called to tell me.

What do University of Miami, Florida State, and University of Florida football fans have in common?

None attended the University of Miami.

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Couple's Daily Question Mug
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What university did Lil Jon go to?

YAAAAAAAAALE

What do you call the grounds of a university that specializes in teaching neuroscience to hippopotamuses?

Hippocampus!

Why do University of Alabama graduates place their diplomas on their rear-view mirrors?

So they can park in handicap spots.

Why doesn't the sun need to go to University?

He's too bright.

What university has the most brightest students and staff?

University of Brighton

Why didn't the sun have to attend university?

It's already got thousands of degrees.

Where did Dr. Pepper get his degree?

The University of Minnesoda

Where did the universe attend college?

At the university.

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Centre Jokes More Centre Jokes

What's at the centre of No Man's Sky universe?

A refund. credit to (saw it on another post as comment, thought it deserved own post)

What do you call the game that centres around weak leadership?

Reddit.

Language Jokes More Language Jokes

What language do birds speak?

Squackhili

What do you call someone who speaks two languages?

Q: What do you call someone who speaks two languages? A: Bilingual Q: What do you call someone who speaks three or more languages? A: Multilingual Q: What do you call someone who speaks one language? A: American

Deserve Jokes More Deserve Jokes

Why are Subway cooks called "Sandwich Artists"?

Even art majors deserve recognition

How old do I look?

9yo: 30 Aww, you deserve ice crea- 9yo: Just like grandma -m but too bad you're not getting any

Fonz Jokes More Fonz Jokes

How did the Fonz die?

Ayyyds

What university department did the Fonz go do when he needed help paying his tuition?

Financial Ayyyyyyd I'll

Kentucky Jokes More Kentucky Jokes

How is Halloween celebrated in Kentucky?

pumpkin

How do you know the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky?

If it was invented anywhere else it would've been called the teethbrush

Gordon Jokes More Gordon Jokes

What if it's daytime?

Batman: *glares at Robin* Gordon: Yeah, what if it- Batman: *smoke bomb*

What does Gordon program in?

FLASH... AAAHHHHHHHH. Its the language of the universe...

Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

Why is the Force like duct tape?

It has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the universe together.

How many physicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Two! one to change the light bulb and the other to rotate the universe!

Brighton Jokes More Brighton Jokes

What university has the most brightest students and staff?

University of Brighton

Who's there ! Brighton ! Brighton who ?

Brighton-der the light of the moon !