Why did vatican invite Bernie not Hillary?

They couldn't afford it.

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Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

Why was the first computer never invited to dinner?

It would just take a few bytes then run.

Why should you never invite a pig to join your tug-of-war team?

Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.

Hillary Jokes More Hillary Jokes

What did Monica say to Hillary before Election Day?

Don't blow it

What's the difference between Hillary and a piece of fruit?

deleted

Afford Jokes More Afford Jokes

What is a double-wide salad?

It's a salad for people who can't afford a house salad

Why did the peasant have poor judgement?

He couldn't afford better judgement I'll be here all day folks

Bernie Jokes More Bernie Jokes

How many Bernie supporters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to hold the lightbulb, and the rest of the world to revolve around them

What would you call the easter egg roll if Bernie Sanders became president?

Weekend at Bernie's.

Vatican Jokes More Vatican Jokes

What part of the Vatican is made entirely out of amino acids?

The Cysteine Chapel

What's the difference between a proclamation from the Vatican and a mail-order husband from ebay?

One's a papal mandate and the other's a paypal man-date.