Why does Sean Connery have no money and a beard?

Because he's no good at shaving.

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Beard Jokes More Beard Jokes

Who can shave 25 times in one day, and still have a beard?

A barber!

What's the difference between Bigfoot and a Mexican with a beard?

Bigfoot is occasionally sighted

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What will you be using the money for?

Me: "A divorce lawyer."

What does having kids bring you that money simply can't buy?

Poverty

Sean Connery Jokes More Sean Connery Jokes

What time does Sean Connery go to the US Open?

Tennish

What did Sean Connery say when a book fell on his head?

I have only my shelf to blame"

Shaving Jokes More Shaving Jokes

Why do Italians wear gold chains?

So they know where to stop shaving.

Why do Greek men wear gold neck chains?

A: So they know where to stop shaving.