Why is marriage is like an alarm clock?

After the ring, you wake up!

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Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What time does a mechanic wake up?

Oily!

What do you need to have to do the dishes when you don't want to?

Dishcipline This is literally a joke I told in a dream and I remembered it when waking up.

Ring Jokes More Ring Jokes

Why was the Lego boxer unmatched in the ring?

He was a master of blocking attacks.

How are a grenade and a wife similar?

If you pull the ring off it, the house is gone

Marriage Jokes More Marriage Jokes

Why do fifty percent of marriages end in divorce?

Well, I'm guessing it's because the other fifty percent can't afford lawyers.

Why does mom always yell at you?

Me: Marriage is complicated. 4: Is it because you're stupid

Alarm Clock Jokes More Alarm Clock Jokes

What is the difference between a baby and a alarm clock?

You only have to hit the alarm clock once to make it be quiet...

Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock?

So he could wake up inside.