Why should you distrust atoms?

Because they make up an awful lot of stuff. EDIT: Because I forgot about neutrinos.

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Stuff Jokes More Stuff Jokes

How is working in I.T. like being a wizard?

You command vast powers beyond the scope of smaller minds, but to them all you do is wiggle your fingers and stuff just happens.

When faced with a challenging situation I calmly ask myself "what would the hulk do?

Then I rip my clothes and smash stuff up!

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

Why can't we edit tweets?

Because if we could I would edit a tweet with 2,000 retweets to say "RT if you hate puppies and babies."

How about that airplane food?

Edit: I'm so sorry.

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

What's worse: Alzheimer or Parkinson?

Alzheimer. I'd rather drink my beer shaking than forget to to drink it.

What do dads never forget to include in their "dad" jokes?

PUNctuation Okay, I'll leave.

Atom Jokes More Atom Jokes

Why did the atoms cross the road?

It was time to split.

What is the similarities between Bernie Madoff and Atoms?

They both make up everything!

Neutrino Jokes More Neutrino Jokes

What do I have in common with neutrinos ?

We're both constantly penetrating your mom

What do I have in common with neutrinos?

We are both constantly penetrating your mum.

Awful Lot Jokes More Awful Lot Jokes

What do you call a group of Ocelot?

An Awful-lot.

Who has two thumbs and looks an awful lot like Alec Baldwin?

Alec Baldwin

Distrust Jokes More Distrust Jokes

Why do Texans duel at high noon?

They distrust clocks.

Why should you distrust atoms?

Because they make up an awful lot of stuff. EDIT: Because I forgot about neutrinos.