Absolutely Sense Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

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How many of my fellow Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one of course, as we are highly efficient and have absolutely no sense of humour.

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Bleed Jokes More Bleed Jokes

What has two legs and bleeds?

Half of your dog...I hit it with my car.

What's got two legs and bleeds?

half a dog Derek, s01e05

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many r/jokes redditors does it take to change a lightbulb?

Answer is 2. One to change the lightbulb while the other screams "REPOST"

How many Sore Losers does it take to change a Lightbulb?

Won.

Humour Jokes More Humour Jokes

What's an actuary?

An accountant without the sense of humour.

What is the most offensive joke you know?

I'm bored tonight and I have a no holds barred sense of humour. What are some of your worst

German Jokes More German Jokes

Why did the two most senior nuns in the convent break up a German terror plot to steal millions in bearer bonds?

Old habits die hard

What kind of car did the German cowboy purchase?

Audi *tips hat*

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

Why didn't Cathy keep the extra dollar of change at Chick-fil-a?

Because Cathy can't help being Truett-ful

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb?

You can't tell it's in the dark

Humor Jokes More Humor Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke?

please let me know... I have a terrible sense of humor!

Paper Cut Jokes More Paper Cut Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

What does Morpheus seek for paper cuts?

Neosporin.

Course Jokes More Course Jokes

What do you call a disobedient feline pirate?

A mew-tineer! And what do you call a genetically altered cow A moo-tant, of course!

What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?

Angel food cake of course!