Bar Stool Jokes

What do you call a 1,000 pound woman sitting on a bar stool?

A half-ton pickup.

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How do you fit 4 guys on a bar stool?

Turn it upside-down. But how do you get them off Shake the stool. (OK, I'll leave now.)

How do you fit 4 girls on a bar stool?

Flip it over

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Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

How many midgets does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I'd be surprised if you could fit two in there

Why did King Kong.... Climb the Empire State Building?

He couldn't fit in the elevator.

4 Girl Jokes More 4 Girl Jokes

How do you fit 4 girls on a bar stool?

Flip it over

How do you get 4 girls to sit on one chair?

You flip it upside down.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

How can you tell when a bar is haunted?

It's full of Boo's and Spirits.

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What would Hillary tell Bill when she will sit at the Oval Office?

Close, Bill, but no cigar!"

Why should you never sit at the top deck of a double decker bus?

Because there is no driver up there.

Shake Jokes More Shake Jokes

Why was the dog shaking?

He had Barkinson's

Why is the fridge shaking so much?

It's running just fine. Probrably because it's so turned on!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you say to a man with a broken lizard?

Sorry about your reptile dysfunction.

How can you tell God is a man?

If God was a woman sperm would taste like chocolate

Upside Jokes More Upside Jokes

What is the most popular cheese in "the Upside Down"?

Demogorgonzola

What do you do when you see an upside down dolphin?

You flipper!

Diaper Jokes More Diaper Jokes

How do diapers work?

Hnng. Aaaaaaaah. Like that. I'll show myself the door.

What diapers should you put on a dead baby?

Pamperspired.