Heavy Metal Jokes

What are a terrestrial planet's favorite genres of music?

Rock and Heavy Metal

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What's Magneto's favorite type of music?

Heavy Metal!

Why is Dave Mustaine described as "heavy metal"?

Because he sings lead. (Better read than said.)

Why should you not throw stones at a knight?

Because heavy metal is harder than rock.

What is a chemists favourite type of music?

Heavy Metals.

What kind of music do welders like?

Heavy metal.

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What is Santa Claus' favorite metal band?

Sleigher

What's Santa's favourite heavy metal band?

Sleigher

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What does Santa call it when Mrs. Claus gives him road head?

Getting sleighed.

What religion is Santa?

He's egg-nog-stic

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How do Freudians describe the human mind?

As a huge ENEMA, I mean huge enigma.....

How would you best describe him?

Me: He looks like a miniature cat

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Why was the welder such a gossip?

Because he liked to meddle.

What did the doctor tell a welder when the welder asked if his girlfriend(a pilot) using alternative lube was giving him erectile dysfunction?

Jet fuel can't melt steel beams

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Where does a knight go to get his armor?

The hard-wear store

What do you call a knighted cow?

Sir Loin

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What kind of girl does a hamburger like?

Any girl named Patty!

What kind of aids he got?

Financial aids ! !

Rock Jokes More Rock Jokes

How do you discipline your pet rock?

You hit rock bottom!

What does a walrus and Tupperware have in common?

What does a walrus and Tupperware have in common? .. They both like a tight seal *What looks like a lemon and shaped like a rock? .. A lemon shaped rock *What is brown and sticky? ..A brown stick

Fruit Jokes More Fruit Jokes

What did the vegatable say to the fruit?

Turnip

What do you call two fruits that can't get married?

Cantaloupes