Obese Man Jokes

What did the obese man say about the belt he'd recently purchased?

Top notch.

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How much did the obese man know about fitness?

Diddly squat

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Diddly Squat Jokes More Diddly Squat Jokes

What kind of exercises do lazy people do?

Diddly-squats

How much did the obese man know about fitness?

Diddly squat

Notch Jokes More Notch Jokes

What's the difference between an Irish Catholic and a Roman Catholic?

A few notches on the belt buckle.

What did the obese man say about the belt he'd recently purchased?

Top notch.

Belt Jokes More Belt Jokes

Why did the belt get arrested?

Because it held up a pair of pants. I'll show myself out.

Why shouldn't you wear a watch on your belt?

It'd be a waste of time.

Obese Jokes More Obese Jokes

What's a similarity between obese people, and my relationships with women?

They don't work out.

What do programmers and obese people have in common?

They both call an 8-course meal a bite.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know you can't trust doctors and lawyers?

Because they both "practice" their professions.

How the hell should I know?

Let me talk to a few criminals and see who they think is scariest."

Fitness Jokes More Fitness Jokes

How much did the obese man know about fitness?

Diddly squat

How do you tell if someone is riding a bicycle for fitness or because they have a DUI?

The cigarette.

Purchase Jokes More Purchase Jokes

What does Harry Potter say after he purchases slaves?

I expect to Potter-own 'em.

Why did the bachelors purchase double amputee strippers for their party?

Because they were 50% off!