How did you end up here?

Elderly me: I made my kids steak instead of hot dogs. Him: *gasps* You monster.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What present did the kid with no hands get?

Gloves. Ha! Just kidding, I don't know what he got, he hasn't opened it yet.

What do you throw a drowning Mexican?

His wife and kids.

End Jokes More End Jokes

What word starts with N and ends with R and you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

How is Game of Thrones going to end?

With fade out and to credits.

Hot Dog Jokes More Hot Dog Jokes

What does the hot dog say when it crosses the finish line?

I'm the wiener!

What's the opposite of a hot dog "Um...a cold cat?

Exactly. Now let's talk about Fluffy

Steak Jokes More Steak Jokes

What can I get for you?

Me: Steak, please. W: How would you like that cooked M: By anyone other than my wife

Why are the steaks so high?

Because the pot was calling the cattle back and the cows went back to the marijuana field.

Monster Jokes More Monster Jokes

What do you get if you cross a monster with a flea?

Lots of very worried dogs.

What kind of money do monsters use?

Weirdo (weird dough).

Gasp Jokes More Gasp Jokes

How did you end up here?

Elderly me: I made my kids steak instead of hot dogs. Him: *gasps* You monster.

What does it mean when a man is in your bed, gasping for air, and calling your name?

You didn't hold down the pillow for long enough.